By: Julie Griffith
I am so pleased to announce that my son, Cameron William Griffith, arrived the day before his due date on July 17 at 1:06 p.m., weighing in at 7 lbs. 1 oz. and 20 inches long.
My birth expectation was that I would labor at home until my contractions hit the cardinal, 5-1-1 rule (5 minutes apart, 1 minute in length for at least an hour) and then my husband and I would peacefully drive to Texas Children’s Pavilion for Women, and labor for a couple more hours.
Our reality was more like that of a Hollywood movie scene, complete with plowing through trash cans in our neighborhood, running red lights, and screaming in excruciating pain as my husband wheeled me through the Pavilion lobby. We arrived in the nick of time, as Cameron was born just 26 minutes later.
Leading up to birth, I figured my maternity leave would be more like a maternity ‘transition’; a time to not only care for my new baby but to embrace the fact that my life would never be the same again. Going in, I had pretty clear expectations, some of which were spot on, and others, well…what was I thinking?!
Expectation #1: I would be a whirlwind of productivity.
Reality: I considered writing one thank you note and showering before 4 p.m. a productive day. I had envisioned spending my “down time” trying out new recipes, organizing the junk drawer, and working on my scrapbook. In reality, I spent most of my days hunkered down on the couch clipped into my nursing pillow. When I wasn’t sitting and nursing, I was playing with Cam or laying down as he napped on my chest. We tried to stick to the EASY routine: Eat, Activity, Sleep, You time. However, I was often too on edge to enjoy the “You time”, in anticipation of Cameron waking. During any fleeting moments of guilt for my lack of daily accomplishments, I would remind myself that this was precious bonding time. The dishes in the sink could wait!
Expectation #2: Breastfeeding would be hard.
Reality: Breastfeeding/pumping is really hard. From the beginning, we struggled with latch issues and a sleepy eater who needed constant stimulation to stay awake to feed. At Cameron’s one month checkup, we learned that he was in the 10th percentile and not gaining weight appropriately. Our pediatrician recommended we see a lactation consultant right away. I learned he was not transferring milk well due to a poor latch caused by a lip tie, plus his lazy feeding behavior. This had also affected my milk production. And so commenced what I called the “triple feeding:” breastfeeding followed by breast pumping, then topping him off with a bottle of breast milk. This feeding process lasted about an hour and a half and then the process would start over again two hours later. We had his lip tie corrected, strictly monitored his weight gain, and did everything under the sun to boost my milk supply. Needless to say, Operation Feed Cameron consumed my life for the greater portion of my maternity leave. Even though breastfeeding is still challenging, I am happy to share that Cameron is now thriving.
Expectation #3: I would be gallivanting around town with baby in tow.
Reality: I predicted lunching with friends, walking around Memorial Park, and even mentally planned a family vacation for while I was on leave. Between the daunting task of packing the diaper bag, 100 degree summer temperatures, navigating the stroller in tight situations, and being tied to my Medela pump, it simply felt more comfortable staying at home. Our big outings seemed to be trips to H.E.B, Babies”R”Us or the grandparents’ house.
Expectation #4: I could handle caring for a newborn on my own.
Reality: I don’t typically seek support from others, however the first few weeks became a quick lesson on how caring for a newborn takes a village, and why I needed to be willing to let that village in. My “village” recognized the fact that this was precious mother-son bonding time and they demonstrated their support by helping me get caught up on cleaning, laundry, and errands. Plus, we were extremely grateful to friends and colleagues with dinner deliveries in the first few weeks!
Before Cameron arrived, we tried to prepare for life with a newborn by attending most of the prenatal education courses offered through the Pavilion for Women. All of the classes provided valuable information however the Bringing Baby Home course was the most impactful. After eleven years as a twosome we expected that transitioning from a couple to parents would be challenging. This course helped ground our expectations and taught us practical skills to be the best parenting team possible. Although everyone’s experience with a new baby is different, I will always look back fondly on this dedicated time with my son as the beginning of an indescribable love that continues to blossom every day.